Time to Register?

Well I guess so! A friend of mine who is about 6 weeks ahead of me began registering at 12 weeks and I thought that was crazy, I couldn't even comprehend being pregnant yet, I mean through the fatigue, let alone what we would need for the little sesame seed.  But sure enough it is one of the first questions people are asking. So we are going to venture a go at it heading into week 15.

But FIRST I want to know from all of you...what the heck should we even put on our registery? We have never done this before so I don't have a clue as to what is really useful, versus what is nice, and to the down right epic fail items. I really don't want a registry full of items that we won't use or that others are not interested in getting.

Dogs? Now we could help you out there...but babies? Totally uncharted territory for this very toddler unfriendly, sharp corner, every plug is exposed household.

Here is what I would LOVE for you to do if you don't mind. Leave a comment here, if you can with a link, telling us about the specific item and more importantly what it is used for :)

It takes a village right?

p.s. Some Q&A if it is helpful
We are not going to find out the sex, well at least not until the big day, so suggestions on both sides are great.
I am planning on giving breast feeding a go.
We are looking at Amazon and Baby Depot at Burlington Coat Factory.

Anything else just ask and I will try to answer! Let the suggestions begin!

Cricket... Cricket...

My apologizes to everyone who has visited my page looking for an update to no avail!  I have been so bad, I finally get pregnant and poof drop off the face of the planet.  Well for those of you that have gone through this before you know just how exhausting the first trimester can be.  Seriously, I was not prepared for the fatigue at all.  It totally took my surprise.  There have been loving joking comments such as "Junelle's boring" and "I basically already have a kid, I feed her, burp her, and send her to bed".  It's been bad.

Here is was my typical first trimester schedule:

4:45am... Wake up and hit snooze, crawl out of bed, force myself to shower and get ready for work. Grabbing a rice cake or soda cracker along the way.

7:15am... Get to work, and try not to fall asleep at my computer.  Eat small meals through out the day, keep my garbage can right next to my chair, and when all else fails suck on preggo pops and saltines and pray.

6:00pm... Get home from work, go straight to the bathroom then straight to kitchen and grab anything within edible distance.  The key for me I found was not going too long without eating.  An empty stomach equaled the worst nauseau

7:15pm... After eating dinner, putting on sweats, doing MAYBE one productive thing around the house, fall asleep on the couch and Dayleen has to remind me to shove off to bed.

11:00pm... Get up and pee

1:30am.... Get up and pee, AGAIN

3:00am... Are you kidding me?  How much is too much for a bladder to take?????

4:45am... Do it all over again.

As you can see, there wasn't much time for me to blog, which I admittedly was sad about.  Because I have been looking forward to journaling this adventure with you.  Now that I am feeling a little better and can actually make it to 8:30pm hopefully I will be able to fill you with more musings and insights to my fun and cranky journey.  

One more thing:  My props go out to moms with several kids, I have no idea how you do it but more power to you.  My poor dogs have been neglected.  Certainly the necessities of food, water, and going potty have been met but hardly extra curricular activities.  Thank God the warrior princess is home right now.  But you have all my respect.  It seems crazy that anyone could do this and still have little ones running around.  

Finally for your viewing pleasure here are the pictures from the last ultrasound we had of the sesame seed, the uncooperative little seed that it was being:

It's Alive!!

The Warrior Princess is off to Texas to begin her adventure into the civilian world! We had today's first ultrasound scheduled originally for today in Tacoma and the clinic had to call and cancel and had nothing available before the Warrior Princess was scheduled to leave.  We were so bummed but the scheduler at the doctor's office worked with me all day and an opening came up for 9am in Bellevue.  I didn't care how far out of the way we had to drive as long as she could be with me.  

So there we were bright and early!  This appointment established a heartbeat and make sure that the gestational sac was forming correctly and the size of the embryo was on target.  You can't hear the heartbeat but you can SEE it!!!  It was crazy, watching this blur of black and white TV snow pump.  

Once a heartbeat can be established the risk (and there is definitely still risk) of miscarriage goes down to about 5%.  So Dayleen was okay with me sharing it with the world!  What a magical moment.  It finally made me feel like all of this exhaustion and nausea and other goofy things are worth it.  Validation that there is really something incredible going on inside of me.  

Here is the heartbeat at a whopping 128 beats per minute!

And here is the Sesame Seed as we have affectionately started calling the embryo even though it is technically almost the size of lima bean now.  Almost 1 inch long!  Kind of crazy.

I am officially accepting recommendations for:

Books (to add to my ridiculous library)

Nausea cures

Ideas to help me sleep

Thank you everyone!!!

And the verdict is in...

WOOHOO!!!   We finally have our first BFP (or Big Old Fat POSITIVE!!)

Holy cow!  This has been confirmed by a blood test at the doctor's office.  I am officially 4 weeks pregnant.  (falalala la laaa)  Oh I'm sorry excuse me but I am floating on air!!

While I have of course gone the nontraditional route in so many ways on this journey, from well the journey itself to blogging about it and having you all come along with me, I am not going to post it on Facebook for a while.  The warrior princess is worried I will jinx it.  But I just can't help myself, I am so friggin excited!! So to compromise, I am telling you for me and we will tell the rest of the world when Dayleen feels it is a little safer.  Deal.

Can I say I feel great right now?  Ask me how I feel again in a few days but right now it is majestic to finally have the positive affirmation that what I have been working for may finally pay off.

So here is the cute story:

In the past I have had a bad and rather expensive habit of testing too early and too many times with heartache and then just to start my period.  This time, well frankly I had to wait because of the hCG shot could create a false positive.  And the Warrior Princess was threatening to lock up all the pregnancy tests on me, so I waited.

But you know this morning, the day I could test I was up bright and early!!  I went in and diligently did what girls do when you are taking a pregnancy test and peed on a stick.  Now, I don't have the best eye sight first thing in the morning without my glasses and all and these things can take a few minutes, so I went back to bed.  Dayleen followed in and yelled "hey!  I see two lines!!"

My response went something like this "You have got to be sh*t'n me" repeated several times.  I mean I have done this a couple of times to no avail after all.

I totally freaked out and could not get back to sleep, so I have been up since and went in the doctor's first thing this morning.  And now with a positive blood test I can share it with you!!

:)

YAY!!!  Now we hope and pray for a whole lot of sticking power and healthy vibes.

Holy Smokes, I am Pregnant

We are off!!

Of course we are finally ready to get started again, and it looked like I wasn't going to ovulate.  Normally I have a positive OPK by day 13... by the time day 16 rolled around and still no pretty little smiley face?  So sad!  I called the clinic to see what they thought, because I was experiencing other signs of ovulation there might have still been a chance.

I went in for the "egg tickler" aka "follicular ultrasound" where they can see your ovaries and tell if you are about the ovulate/already have. And hot dog, just a late ovulation because there was a nice big fat 21 (some measurement) dominant follicle.  The warrior princess thinks my body just didn't want to give it up!  At my age, I only have so many good ones left. :)  So we did an hCG trigger shot to help launch that egg out and went in the next day.  Otherwise, it could have interrupted our Superbowl party (no alcohol for me!!).

It is very exciting to be officially underway on our next series tries.  May the baby dust with us this month. Look for an update in about two weeks :)

And So We Begin Again!!!

We are officially starting to try again!  I am pretty excited.  :)  Now if only that excitement could turn into results.

Since we are starting anew and we used all of the previous donor that we had purchased (a total of 6 vials), we decided to switch it up this time.  We still got some of the more important qualities we were looking for in a donor but this time we were more concerned about the effectiveness of the little guys.  I am sorry I can only be patient so long and spend so much money on the "perfect" donor and have no results.  The end result after all is conception and if that is not occurring than you will just keep spending money and emotional debt and never receive the result you are looking for.  Isn't that what Einstein said the definition of insanity is?  Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.  SO, a new donor it is!

I am also excited about the timing, if I get pregnant within the first couple of tries it will work out well with my work.  

Something else I am going to do different this time is try to continue to living normally and not hyper obsessing about everything.  I am hoping that by doing this I will relax and enjoy the experience a little more.  

Wish us lots o' sticky baby dust!  And as always you can follow along by checking the tracker at the top of my blog that tells you what point I am at.

Thanks everyone.

Healthy Mother, Healthy Pregnancy

During my break I have decided to focus on making the most healthy me that I can, because the best way to have a healthy pregnancy is to have a healthy mother!!  I thought I would share this as well... I mean why not, it's all a part of this grand plan of mine to get pregnant and have a family.  Are you up for it?

Here goes!

My first order of business is to include more fruits, vegetables and whole foods in my diet.  Really what we hear all the time about how to improve our diets.... and promptly ignore. 

My problem?  I don't cook.  Seriously. My first apartment's oven was a desk that I stacked papers on.  I literally never used it. A dear friend of mine Linda Walker used to tell people that I went to the drive through and picked up two cheeseburgers... one for now and one for later.   I just never learned, I look at a cupboard and I do not see food, I see random items that might as well have japanese written all over them.  Once baby sitting when I was younger I screwed up hot dogs.. oh yes hot dogs.  KA BOOM, Ker SPLAT, however you would like to imagine what happens when you put hot dogs in the microwave for 5 minutes.  It's sad, but some how I have made it this far!

I am betting that I am not the only one like this and that's why this adventure is so neat, if I can do it, ANYONE can do it!  

With that in mind, you can see how adding a vegetables to a diet in a substantial manner could stump someone like me.  Vegetables = salad = rabbit food.  Boring.  

Well I am setting out to make it happen, to learn how to eat a whole foods based diet (majority of which is fruits and veggies), cook, and live a healthy lifestyle so that when I do eventually become pregnant and have a family of my own I can set my kids up for success.

I am excited to share this part with you too.  Look for more to come!

Patience is a virtue...

That I seem to be lacking!

I have discovered that trying to get pregnant is more like a marathon than a sprint. And when you train for a marathon you spend months calibrating and preparing your body for in my case what would be 5 hours of a grueling work out.

Even in training for a marathon you have rest days to let your body recover and so I think I am going to take a few months off to refocus and rejuvenite my emotional self. And then jump back in.

The next two months are my craziest at work so the timing works out well. I need to be in the best place possible when I get pregnant and taking a few months will help me do that. Thanks everyone for all your support so far! I will keep you updated on my adventures!

Off to see the wizard!

After not ovulating last month, I was starting to get worried that it was  going to happen again this month when I still did not have a positive OPK yesterday. But you know what they say...something about try try again! And today we finally have success!

This means I get to go in tomorrow and take a pregnancy test in two weeks.

Best friday ever!

Bad Blogger...

I know I have been a bad blogger :(  I thought I had posted something and then realized that I actually lost it into the oblivion that is the web world or possibility posted it somewhere else who knows!  It was this really great piece about patience and odds and the lottery.  In many ways that is how trying to get pregnant can feel like... like planning to win the lotto!  Craziness.

And then we had this last month, and well this last month was not so great and I guess I hid away because of it.  A very dear Pastor of mine once said he always knew when something was wrong with someone in the congregation because they stopped coming to church.  I guess I didn't show up because I was frustrated and didn't want to have to share the bad news of another failed attempt.  It was a crazy month emotionally as well with lots of ups and downs.  Well I invited you on this journey so I shouldn't leave you out in the cold!  It is you my dear friends and family (and dare I say random reader?) that will help me through this and be there with me to cry and to cheer.  So hear goes nothing!

I am not really sure what happened but all evidence points to: either not ovulating at all or I ovulated very early.  In a way it was very sad, like I lost a very important moment.  The opportunity was just gone, particularly if I did ovulate and I somehow missed it. I admittedly freaked out and started doing 3 OPK (ovulation predictor kits) a day thinking that maybe it was late, or that I hadn't timed it just perfect. This lasted until day 17.  For perspective every other month except one a positive OPK came on day 13.  And if you have never bought an OPK let me tell you they are expensive.  Seven tests run you about $30.00.  I scan the papers for sales and coupons.  When really I have been fine doing one a day for the last 5 months and catching my LH surge without any issues.  So, I might have gone overboard.  I just couldn't believe that I wasn't getting a smiley face.  (a smiley face is what appears when you have a positive OPK, its very cute).

It happens sometimes, especially as we get older, that we just don't ovulate.  But alas we are in a new cycle and looking forward to another try.  If this one doesn't work I may consider kicking it up a notch to  IVF.

As I stare down my 34th birthday next week, I so hoped I would be pregnant by now.  But I am grateful that I have someone who loves me and is 20 times more patient than I am (in this area, cleaning out the litter box is a completely different story) and is zen about the whole thing.  She keeps me calm and reminds me about the statistics.  My favorite when I entered in another cycle without a pregnancy into my nifty little app (oh yes, there is an app for this too!!) was that it takes a healthy heterosexual couple (translation: lots of fresh sperm on hand) on average of 3-6 months.  Well I am technically only now on try number 4 over the last 5 months.  So it's not so bad.

I have a theory:  Those who got pregnant on the first try?  They were trying they just didn't count those months because they thought they weren't really trying and everyone else did IVF.  : o)~

Here we go again!  May this month bring a happy egg, doing a happy dance, out to play.

Thanks everyone for your love and support.  Cheers!

Junelle

Tracking Progress

I have added two items to my blog to help everyone track where I am in the process.  The first is a Tracker at the top of my page.  It will count to until either my expected ovulation date, this is usually the day after I do my IUI, and then it will countdown to when I will take a pregnancy test or start my period, you know, whichever comes first :).

Also, I added a new Timeline page (see the tab at the top) to my blog that succinctly wraps up the "adventure" to this point. Hope this helps keep you all up to date!  

If you don't mind me asking...

Of course I don't!  I am happy to share exactly what this is all about.

The topic of "how" is always the awkward part of the conversation when I talk about having a baby.  What  exactly does it involve?  Well it might help by defining what all of the the different terms are that you will hear.

Generally speaking this group of terms are considered artificial insemination, whether from a known or unknown donor or fresh or frozen sperm.  These may be used with or without fertility medications depending on specific needs.

ICI - Intracervical Insemination
 This involves placing (usually with a small needleless syringe) the sperm inside the vagina into/superclose to the cervix.  The cervix is the opening that separates your vagina from the uterus.  Hey, that might seem TMI but I didn't know exactly what it was until I started this process myself.   This is the process that most closely describes how you can do it at home.

IUI - Intrauterine Insemination
This one involves "washing" the sperm so that it is only sperm and not ejaculate.  The sperm are then placed using a syringe attached to a thin catheter directly into the uterus.  Many women take advantage of this option before trying in vitro if fertility issues are unexplained, or for example in order for sperm to travel through the cervix to the uterus a woman must have fertile mucus.  If she does not the sperm are most likely being killed before they ever even make it to the uterus. Another example could be sperm that don't live long enough to make the swim through the cervix.  This is the method that I am doing at the doctor's office.  It has a slightly higher success rate than ICI.


IVF - In Vitro Fertilization
This is when the woman's eggs are removed and then fertilized outside of the body.  The fertilized eggs are then reintroduced.  This is by far the most invasive and expensive procedure.

There you go!  Now you know.

Round #1 for me was ICI at home
Round #2 IUI at the doctor office with an hCG trigger shot that made me bat shit crazy
Round #3 IUI at the doctor office this morning, without the trigger shot just waited for the good old fashion positive Ovulation Predictor Kit and other signs.

Now?  Cross your fingers and wait!  I look forward to more of your questions.  Remember you can email them to me at mjschrum657@gmail.com.

Me Crazy? Possibly, but this doesn’t help!

Most women I know can tell you they are about to start their period, usually because there is key symptoms that clue you in paired with knowing when your period is due. 

If I cry for no reason, almost guaranteed that I will start my period the next morning. 

It usually goes like this.  Cute Coca Cola Polar Bear ad comes on TV. My throat tightens a little bit, my face swells and gets red, and tears sneak out of the corners of my eyes.  Why? Because they are just so cute and touching!! (BLAH - I mean really??? The rest of the time I don’t even care about those silly cartoon bears) and promptly the Warrior Princess will laugh.  Because she knows!! 

Crying because the sky is blue?  That’s just one symptom of a long line and lucky for me I suffer from several of them:

Cramps

Mood Swings and Stress

Swollen Tender Breasts

Fatigue

Food Cravings (I’m sorry did I just eat a whole pizza??)

Bloating

Headaches

Whew!  That’s quite a list, scary part is it isn’t complete. 

Guess what?  These just so happen to be the early symptoms of pregnancy also!  Here are a few more:

Most obvious – missed period BUT you can still have something called implantation bleeding.

Nausea

Frequent Urination

Elevated Body Temprature.

Needless to say, it can be crazy making!  As I head closer to taking another pregnancy test and I battle with these different symptoms, I just don’t know what to think of what my body is telling me.  If you have been pregnant, did you notice anything different before getting a positive pregnancy test and if so what? 

July 4^th here we come!!

The Countdown has begun

This is what my life has become, all the authors warned me about it in the bazillion books I read, breaking your life into two week cycles.

Waiting to ovulate
Waiting to test

Seriously, this is enough to drive a normal person nuts, but an already slightly off kilter, unmedicated person?  Watch out! ;0)

Everyone has that story:  they know someone who from the stress of trying to conceive couldn't.  Then after years of trying and finally adopting they get pregnant.  There is no solid research that confirms this, but it is reasonably to believe that if you are in constant stress you are less likely to conceive.  Stress is your bodies flight or fight response in constant motion.  If your body is in this mode it probably won't want to spare resources to create a new life. Now, I tend to run pretty intense anyway so this has been great practice for me in balance (Cynthia you must be proud to hear me say that).

And if it just so happens to have resulted in a pedicure (can't get those at the salon when your pregnant because of all of the icky chemicals) and an amazing massage to help in that balance.  So be it!  Small price to pay, I say!!

Speaking of which, I am going to do a little plug here for my massage therapist.  She got me through my car accident and now she will help me through this.  It is amazing what a massage can do for you!!  I wanted to be completely zen before I went into the doctor's office.  Her name is Hannah Keefer at Le Chat Noir in Tacoma, http://www.massagebyhannah.massagetherapy.com/ tell her I sent you!  No she isn't paying me and hasn't offered me a kick back, I just like her that much.  I often drool, it's kind of embarrassing.

My point is that for some reason it has taken trying to get pregnant to remind me to take care of myself and reduce stress in my life.  Don't wait for something like this, take care of yourself today.  It's totally worth it!!

20 Questions

As I update you on the happenings and scheduled events there are bound to be questions that come up that would not occur to me on my own. Inquiring minds want to know and I would love to tell! So, if you have a question send me an email at mjschrum657@gmail.com and I will answer in a post. Don't worry I will keep you anonymous but I might assign you your own nifty pseudonym.
I am pretty much an open book or I would not be blogging so this helps me to know what you want to hear about.

Thanks everyone!

Take 2

This month we are moving the action to doctor's office!  There are a couple of benefits to going to the clinic, the biggest one?  Better technology.  For example, at home I get to make an educated guess on when I am going to ovulate based on all of these different signs and symptoms:  body temperature, mucus consistency, and of course the tried and true peeing on an ovulation predictor kit and waiting for the smiley face!

When you use the clinic they can literally do an ultrasound (or as my barista calls it, "egg tickler") to see exactly which ovary will pop out the egg.

Quick lesson on eggs:  your body prepares several eggs every cycle.  But only one of those eggs will actually get released, the rest just get absorbed by your body.  WELL not completely true, sometimes an extra one sneaks out and Voila! Fraternal Twins.  But for the most part, one lucky egg is headed into the great unknown of our uteruses.  Okay back to the original birds and bees lesson.  Your eggs are held inside of follicle.  The follicle that gets the biggest is the one that will release the egg.  You can actually see the follicles with the "egg tickler" as they are developing.

On day 11 I went in, and I had a follicle on one side that was 12 something and on the other side 12.5.  Sooo, basically we couldn't tell which ovary was going to pop that baby out.  What we did know for sure?  I was going to ovulate late this month.  Apparently the 12 range isn't all that spectacular for size.

On day 14 I went back in and POW there she was, busting at the seams!!

Here for your viewing pleasure is my follicle holding the egg.  Yes they let me take a picture, the sacrifices a blogger must make, like saying "is it weird if a I take a picture?"

That night I went home and had to have the Warrior Princess give me a shot of HCG in my every so soft and fluffy  belly.  (It actually stung a little bit I am just trying to make it sound nice).

The HCG acts as a trigger for my follicle, it basically said:  listen hear egg, in 36 hours you are going to bust a move out of here so don't get too comfy.  In my mind I was really saying, oh happy egg, are you ready to go out an play??  Good Egg, Happy Egg.  :) (zen thoughts).

36 hours from the trigger shot I will go in for the IUI.  Yay!!! Round 2 here we come.

BFN

BFN, what does that mean?  I kept seeing it on blogs and message boards and on websites.  BFN, OPK, DPO and then as was introduced to you in the last post TWW.  

Well, BFN means Big Fat Negative :( BOO! lol

I mean rationally I know the likelihood of getting pregnant on the first try is relatively low.  And as most of you know I am a betting woman and well... I wouldn't have taken this bet.  

Emotionally I went all in!  I totally had myself psyched out that I wasn't, but I was and I am.  I mean I can't say I know many women who look forward to getting their period but I never thought I would cry about it either!

The nice thing was it ended the suspense, no more wondering, waiting, thinking and can I tell you: don't go garage sale shopping if you aren't sure! It was like putting an Iced Americano in front of me and telling me I couldn't drink it.  Why couldn't I buy anything you ask?  Because the Warrior Princess might have said that I wasn't allowed to buy anymore baby stuff until I am actually pregnant.  You see, I might have amassed a small collection over the last couple of months.  What? Don't look at me that way!  It's called planning people, planning.  

But you know there is a little saying in sales, each no means you are closer to a yes. So hot dog, this means I am just one try closer to getting a BFP!! (Big Fat Positive)

Keep an eye on my tracker at the top of blog for key points this month.

Two Week Wait

The TWW or Two Week wait is the hardest part of this whole process! Are you or aren't you?  What should you be eating, what not?  What kind of excercise can I do?  How soon can I take a pregnancy test?  It is very stressful!

To help everyone track where I am on my journey I have added a tracker to the top of my blog so you will know where I am in my cycle pertinent to different goals:  Days to ovulation (basically when I will go to the clinic) and then Days to taking a pregnancy test (or to AF - Aunt Flo arriving lol, these are the official terms of blogosphere I will have you know.  Technical aren't they?)

Welcome to my rollercoaster!  It is a crazy one for me so it might be for you too.

Picking up the kids

We picked up the "kids" yesterday and now we are just waiting for my LH surge (positive smiley face ovulation predictor kit).  

So who is the donor, you ask?

There are lots of different ways people decide on their donor choice.  Some women choose a donor that resembles their partner as much as possible, others look for distinct traits to either complement or balance their own traits, in the 5 books I have read on the subject so far (so I am slightly obsessive) one women literally called the sperm bank and asked which donor had the most pregnancies because the most important thing to her was that the swimmers were getting the job done! Let me tell you at $600 a try, that is very important!  You really don't want to have to try more than necessary, and let's face it I am on a timeline.  I would be lying if I didn't tell you that the fact that the donor already had 2 kids of his own wasn't reassuring.

We opted to choose a donor that we could both use since the plan is for us both to have a baby (NO not at the same time, though tempting...).  So we looked for things that would balance us both out.  I know crazy isn't it??  After you throw down several grand to ensure adequate supply getting to pick and choose doesn't seem so crazy.  

Now there are never any guarantees with genetics (okay maybe some) but you can certainly increase your odds.  The donor is tall and thin (long distance runner), hey I need to balance out the fat gene.  Brown hair and blue eyes, we both have blue eyes recessive in our immediate families so it couldn't hurt to throw that in.  No immediate family history of cancer or alcoholism (so I might have a few things I need to balance out). Has 3 degrees that spans both mine and the Warrior Princess's interests.  This is really quite summarized for the 20 page document of essays and personality tests and family medical history but you get the picture.  

I know it seems superficial in many ways but I have to tell you we probably have way more information on the donor than most women have on the men they are marrying.  Additionally, I can say with certainty that it is more than you get with a Yahoo Personal.  I do feel pretty good about the process.  

What do they look like?  Well, here is a pic of me picking them up at the bank yesterday and bringing them home.  For the record, they recommended seat belting them in! :)

An Egg Walks Into A Bar...

There are bars, match.com, eharmony, and apparently the produce section at Trader’s Joe’s. And now allow me to introduce you to the ultimate shopping aisle for your future children: the sperm bank. For some, there is an endless free supply found it the form of an intimate partner.  Mine does not come with such a supply, but hot damn if I can’t get pregnant I just happen to have a second set of ovaries on hand as a back up plan. As the Warrior Princess puts it “we have two shots at this”.  The fact remains we need some little swimmers to get our little kickers.

Anyone who knows me knows I LOVE to shop.  I must admit, that in all my adventures I have never shopped for anything like this. 

At first I thought there was only like 1, but with modern shipping and technologies you can access facilities all over the country.  Their prices, “products”, requirements, and philosophies vary so much it is almost incomprehensible.  Some charge more for PHD graduates, another has only donors that are willing to be known after only 3 months after the baby is born.  While others still get down to the basics and don’t mess around with fluff.

Now let me tell you!  There is almost too much information out there.  I started making spreadsheets …and had to stop.  Some banks offer celebrity look a likes, while others still offer baby photos of the donors, or photo matching to someone you know.  Kiersey Personality tests?  You bet.  Wanna hear their voice? Some have that too. Facial feature assessment by staff? Sure, why not.  Baring everything privately medical out for the whole world?  Required.

Sperm banks of the movies?  I don't know that those places actually exist.  You can't just walk in make a deposit and leave.  One showed the level of attrition of donors from when they first come in until the ones that are actually offered up and it was only like 1% of the initial applicants.  Can you imagine?  As I was filling out my own medical questionnaire for my fertility clinic I realized that no one would want my sperm if I had any to offer.  I totally would have been washed out early on.

Ladies, before you get married have your man donate sperm.  Why you ask? Because you will find out more about him and his family's medical history then you ever even thought to ask about.  Sure it takes away some of the mystery of getting to know someone, but heck you will have a full panel STD test done and at least you won't be getting to know him in a way you didn't want to.  Seriously, as a guy I would think you would have to have certain tough skin to make it through the screening process. Then you have to wait 6 months and do it all over again.

Needless to say this part of the process has been months in the making because of the sheer volume of information to absorb and work through.  But I do want to make a declaration: We are thankful for the dedication and tenacity of these donors.  Because of their willingness to follow through a minimum of 6 month process and uncomfortably private questions and testing done on them that a majority of people would never have done, we, and many other families have a chance to have a baby.  So thank you! (Not that any of them are reading my blog lol)